I am not a big fan of Valentine's day...never really have been. It's not like I have had a bad experience or that I am not loved it's just that I don 't like that people use this one day to show someone they love them. I understand not ALL people do this but most of the time it is the case. Men spend a lot of money on flowers, chocolates, gifts, a fancy dinner and more today just to say I love you. Why not use that money throughout the year??? I guess I just don't get it. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy seeing all the love that is involved in today I just don't understand why people can't be this way all the time.
Matt and I don't celebrate Valentine's Day...lucky him :) Truly it has nothing to do with me not liking love or gifts it is that we celebrate our love through out the year. He is wonderful at sending me flowers "just because", taking me on a date, letting me know that he loves me and he doesn't need a special day for that. I am not knocking or trying to bring down anyone that LOVES Valentine's Day this is just how I feel.
Although with all that said, I still take today and look at my relationship with Matt and I am so thankful he is my husband. Today more than ever I need him, I love him, and treasure him. With the roller coaster of emotions I have been on lately, he has always been my firm ground. When I broke down in tears last night and couldn't tell him why, he just held me and told me he loved me, and he supported me NO MATTER WHAT! He didn't even know that is what I needed to hear at that moment but it was. When I back off and shut down my heart to everyone else in my life, he stills pushes against the wall to knock it down. When I tell him he deserves better, he looks me in the eyes and tells me I am the best thing on this earth and he could not imagine his life without me, and he means it. When I am bitchy (which has been often lately), he just listens and still tells me he loves me. And when I am hurting and can't smile he knows just what to say to make me laugh. When times get hard he will do something that reminds me of why I love him so much. So even though I am not a big fan of today, I will take the time to let Matt know that he is everything to me, he is my best friend, my firm ground when it seems like I am on a constant roller coaster, my voice when I can't speak and so much more. I love you more today than ever and I look forward to many more years with you...with or without celebrating Valentine's Day.